When I was younger I would look at women as an aloof untouchable race that HAD to be captured. They were such a strange prey! They didn’t know whether they liked being chased or not. After a hunt I would get together with my hunting buddies and talk about the conquest. The one that just barely escaped or the one that turned and attacked! It was as if we were in an ancient lodge smoking cigars and cleaning our shotguns instead of being at the high school lunch table .
I have a bit of a hobby I like really nutty girls. Stalker? Where!? Is she hot!?? One of the first times I realized I liked the crazy ones was when I had a Brazilian girl get my number “for a friend”. She was sitting with her boyfriend and it seemed innocent enough. Then the texts started to come and soon got a little suspicious. I was a bit surprised that she was texting me since I knew her boyfriend! I mean we weren’t the closest of friends but still! Fortunately, I knew right away what she was up to and I didn’t play. She wanted me to chase her… She was wagging her little deer tail, just dying for me to shoot her. Now most deer run away once they realize the hunter does not have any desire to kill them. But not this one. She wagged her little white tail some more, backed up a little closer to me. Wagged again, walked a little closer, gave me a funny look that said “are you a fricken hunter or what?”
When a woman lets it slip that she wants me to chase her I can’t help but see to what lengths she will go. This is where the crazies come in, they don’t sense what is inappropriate. They run in, charge the hunter, knock him down bounce on his chest while screaming “shoot me! Damn it Shooooot meee!!!” I get so much inner glee to see the role reversal.
I had an epiphany once in early college after another one of these crazy girl attacks. The epiphany may not seem like a big deal but for a guy it was shocking. Sitting in front of the TV with a beer in hand it just came to me! All these years I had been thinking that I was getting the girl but finally I realized that I was being gotten. WHOA… Wait a sec, my brain froze for a little while as something so incredibly obvious peeled open. It was almost as if I realized for the first time there was a connection between urinating and fluid intake. I thought how is that possible?? I mean it was obvious but so baffling, why didn’t I get it sooner? Why would I be blinded to the fact that the deer actually wanted to be chased and shot??? That somehow I was duped into thinking that I was the only one in control.
Guys are strange critters, we are smart but are very dominated by our drives. Chasing the opposite sex is so deeply ingrained in our minds that it is like a dog chasing a cat. The dog may really be bright but the minute that cat runs, evolution takes over and he MUST run it down.
So as a woman how do you get a particular guy to chase you? This is sometimes a bit tough. Imagine the dog again, he is in a room full of cats which one should he chase? Some dogs have learned that he cannot chase all of the cats at the same time. Some of the cats don’t run and therefore are no fun to chase. Some cats chase dogs and this is really confusing! Some cats, scratch and bite, they are fun to chase but not so fun later. Which one to go after??
You as the cat liked to be chased but you can never let the dog know that (but usually he is too stupid to get it). So you tease the dog, you excite him a bit, be playful, hide, play with other dogs, scratch him, piss him off and finally when he is at his peak RUN! He will chase you and will have the satisfaction that when he catches you and eats you as if it were entirely his idea.
• You are not a dog you are a cat! Dogs don’t like to be chased by cats!
• It is far more attractive to the guy to think he is in control, so let him believe it
• To be the cat he chases you must be different than the other cats
• If he does not want to shoot you for GOD SAKES move on to another hunter
• The most attractive prey is the one that is also the most challenging