How to ask a guy out – what you don’t understand…

19 Responses to “How to ask a guy out – what you don’t understand…”

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  1. Rose says:

    Agh this freaks me out. I suppose men ask out women in the same way. I always take things as platonic, just being friendly. I’m naieve.

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  2. Mike Masters says:

    HA! that is funny, but very true. I think men do ask women out in similar ways.
    So Rose… I am going to an SA meeting and I need to bring a friend. Care to join me?

  3. PrincessT says:

    I’m a reformed asker-outer or try-too-harder, and I totally think asking guys out doesn’t work. I used to do it because it was easy for me to ask guys out. I may not be Miranda Kerr, but I’m pretty attractive so I never got turned down, which made me think it was a genius way of getting dates! But then I saw the pattern of guys never making an effort and then me having to kick them to the curb as quickly as I picked them up.

    Now I don’t do that anymore. It’s sort of frustrating when you don’t have a date, and you really want one, and all it would take is 5 minutes with that guy over there…

    On that note, can I ask a related question: I’ve been working on a theory I like to call the ‘girl next door’ phenomenon – is it true that guys would rather ask out the nice looking, sort of cute, but generally plain down to earth girl because she’s less intimidating than the uber-sexy high maintenance European supermodel type (just to be clear, I’m not saying I’m either one, I’m just choosing two extremes to illustrate the point)? Or is that just a girl myth hot girls made up to explain why they are single? Or is it that men instinctively sense the probability of rejection and search for a safer kill? Thoughts?
    .-= PrincessT´s last blog ..Meeting Men =-.

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    • Mike Masters says:

      Thanks for backing up what I have to say.
      I really like your question! Lets talk about that…

      • Jules says:

        After reading Princess T’s comment/question about guys being intimidated by attractive women so they don’t ask them out but ask out the girl next door. I am very interested in what you have to say about that one Mike. As you know, I’ve recently ventured back out in to the dating world (btw, haven’t made up my mind about the online dating thing yet). The ones I’m really interested in (live people), I can’t get them to ask me out. Some of my long-time male friends say that “I’m attactive & that I’m intimidating them”, both of which I don’t agree with. But what if…I’m very curious in what you have to say.

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        • Mike Masters says:

          Funny you asked about that, I am writing a post about it right now. I imagine it will come out on tuesday?

        • Natalie says:

          Hm, well, let’s see what you have to say about this, Mike, but I would have to say that I feel like that phenomenon only exists in a smaller group of pretty insecure men. For the most part, I think that men are always interested in “dating up”. (Actually, even though I in many ways don’t believe in “leagues”, it seems that, on some level, they do exist. That being said, few people want to date people that are “in their league”…) Additionally, because men feel like there is going to be more “competition” for someone “uber-sexy”, they are willing to take a risk and ask her out “before someone else does”. The risk is decreased for them in the fact that they consider that the “girl next door” or the “plain Jane” will probably “still be there” if the supermodel turns them down.

          “Or is that just a girl myth hot girls made up to explain why they are single?” That’s MY guess…

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  4. Dating Diva says:

    I do think that sometimes a guy perceives a girl asking him out as strong and assertive without fear of rejection…and I think sometimes that will draw a guy to a girl like that. But like you said, the key is having the ability to pull back. That is the part that is hard as hell for me.
    .-= Dating Diva´s last blog ..I Vow Not to Let Anyone Waste My Time =-.

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  5. QTMama says:

    I am all about never asking the man out, but I do get a LARGE case of the “impatient” going on, when (and if) I like him enough to WANT to be asked out again.

    Hmmm … The sad part is, finding someone that I want to spend more than an hour with. *Thinking face* And not wanting to kick their ass. *Grin*

    Terrible, I know. But honest, as well.
    .-= QTMama´s last blog ..The Water Pipe vs QT =-.

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    • Mike Masters says:

      I think my friend DD has the same problem.
      This is why I think it is very important to be involved (not necessarily sexually) with more than one guy when you are dating.

      And you’re so violent! maybe that’s why he is afraid to call you back?

  6. “Don’t ask him out unless you have bigger balls than he does.”

    He, now that’s pretty funny! Although I kind of feel like were back in high school asking a guy if he would ‘help us with our homework’ *wink wink*
    .-= lifebeginsat30ty´s last blog ..Old Git, Part II =-.

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    • Mike Masters says:

      I know what you mean… This post did feel a little juvenile to write. However, a LOT of the people that ask me about this topic are in their 30’s.

      I think it is one of those issues that never goes away but we really think it should.

  7. LindseyLoo says:

    hahaha, nice. Master dater rhymes with….
    I like your posts! It’s nice to see what a guy really thinks – other than boobs and beer.

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