It is 3 in the morning and my phone is ringing, I am still up because there is a party at my house in the process of winding down. I am a bit too happy because I lost at a card game and was forced to drink copious amounts of wine. I am DRUNK, I don’t really like to get drunk but it is kind of unavoidable when your friends are all in their 20’s (I find most people my age a bit dull). Phone is still ringing and I look down, wait… do phones really ring anymore? I think mine was making the noise of an elephant seal rutting, a kind of deep guttural thrusting sound. I found the sound online and thought it so obnoxious that I just had to make it a ring tone. So the phone is wildly grunting in my hand and I look down to see that it is my booty call! She for some reason has the uncanny ability to call me when my defenses are down, every time I am weak she seems to know and invites herself over. This does not mean that I was not interested in sex but at the time I didn’t want any female entanglements. So I let it happen and they repeated, for about 6 months until things changed just like the ring tone on my phone. (FYI, found an incredibly annoying ring tone of a baby wailing, it sends mothers into fits at the grocery store)
In a previous post I told you about my incredibly attractive friend Ginga. I was nuts about her and she never knew it, well maybe she had a suspicion. Maybe she didn’t care since me being “into someone” at the time meant she was one of five. I would call her to hang out or she would call me, we would get insanely drunk and eventually roll around naked for a while. I guess I was her booty call. I was the cute guy that gave her attention that she could never take seriously. Well now that I think about it, maybe it is even more pathetic. I think I wished I were her booty call. Sex would not happen very often between us and I was often left wanting to attack her after she passed out on my sofa but could never bring myself to do it, for some reason I was a gentleman. TOTALLY off topic, one time when Ginga passed out, my large parrot decided she wanted to sleep next to her. Crystal the bird was incredibly happy snuggling. In her elation she chewed Ginga’s skirt clean off!!! No joke! chewed it all the way down one side until it was hanging on by a thread! Ginga woke up shocked and laughed her ass off. She was a cool chick, and so was my bird. I am bummed they are both gone from my life.
SOOOO…. Back the booty call.
This is how it works
people go through a decision tree when the meet the opposite sex.
The first branch is:
Would I have sex with this person, YES or NO
(I have a third category involving intoxication, I sound like a drunk on this post!)
If yes, then is this person relationship/marriage potential, YES or NO
BTW this is not everyone but most people that would bother to read this blog go through that tree, granted a lot of men skip the second question.
So what happens when the first question is yes but the second is no? Well that is when the person falls into BOOTY CALL territory! Now this is a very important lesson for men and women. For men, they are very often sending out the wrong signal!!! They have been brain washed by their mom’s that they must act like marriage material when all they really want is to have some sex. This is Bryce in a nutshell, wants to date, does not want to get serious but get LOCKED in by ladies looking for a husband, drives him crazy! But is very entertaining for me.
Now as a woman this is an important thing to understand, if you want a relationship with a guy you must ask yourself,
Are you feeding question number one or number two?
- If you desire to be relationship material with a specific guy you cannot feed the sexual side too much or you may never get the relationship!
- Understand that a lot of guys seem like they want a relationship when all they want is intercourse, this is as confusing to guys as it is to you
- There is nothing wrong with a booty call! But without fail one partner wants more
- If you would like me to be your booty call please email me your application!
{ 2 comments… read them below or add one }
I like how you break it down for the two stages.
And i do agree with you that we have been conditioned to believe that we must get married, must act “nice”.
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Kinda funny how most women are a bit disgusted by the nice guy even though they might argue it is not true.