Don’t allow texting sex talk – You know how men start sexting dirty right away, or look for some lame excuse to text something nasty? This is because men need to filter women, is she sex material or relationship material? If you respond overly soon with sexual messaging, guess which category you will fall into. I imagine if you are reading this you want to be considered relationship material NOT sex material. This is why you need to ignore or even get upset with his constant sexual pushing. Resisting in this area does two positive things: you are taken more seriously and pushed into the relationship category AND believe it or not sexual tension is built simply by resisting it. So even if you want to rip his clothes off and devour every sweaty inch of him, error on the side of caution! and never virtually flash your boobs. There are so many better things that you can be doing to increase the attraction, and using sex is bound to backfire.

How guys think differently about texting

This of course is not all men, but I would have to say the majority of men think along these lines and you could apply this to the real world as well as the virtual one.

Text me back!

Your phone is a tool – most men do not see texting as entertainment, of course men enjoy getting to know a woman but so often he is clueless that you are the one he needs to get to know. If he is SMS-ing you back one-word answers or not answering, it is possible he either hates texting or really isn’t that interested. This is where you need to make him interested! Something I spend a lot of time talking about in, TextAppeal

Guys are fixers – This ties into the one above, guys don’t gossip (well not as much). They don’t process information the same way that women do. A guy isn’t nearly as interested when you text about your boss as your friend might be. Most men see your processing of information as something he needs to change to win your approval. Don’t confuse him and yourself by sending him things that he will feel required to fix. [click to continue…]


He will text you constantly!

I imagine that you are here because something didn’t go your way. You text him and he didn’t sms you back or his answer was very short. You are not really sure about his intentions or if he is even interested. You feel like you might have messed things up, and all you want to do is get his attention back! I am a guy that wants you to WIN in the relationship game. I apologize in advance for being rough but stick with me!

Curb your impatience – This is advice I give both men and women in the area of texting. Patience is a hell of a virtue and it shows that you have emotional maturity. When texting a guy I know it is really frustrating when he doesn’t take the situation with as much severity. To win, you need to show some self-restraint and understand that he may not consider messaging you as important as you do. Rather match his interest, and hold back from texting him!

Text back only when he does – Ties right into the above, you need to let him take the lead here. You need to set the stage for the type of relationship you would like to have with him later. If you are the one constantly texting him and showing need, this will continue into whatever relationship you create with him. (This means you will be the one to ask him out, he won’t do it ever) Make sure you ONLY text when he does and it wouldn’t hurt to forget to sms back every once in a while. [click to continue…]


Riding the cusp of the relationship wave

Riding the cusp of the relationship wave

Seriously? you want to marry her?

I got into horrible trouble after a conversation, with my sisters psycho ex-boyfriend. “Dude, stop. I know you are in love with my sister but seriously? Come on buddy, there are two types of girls in the world, the ones that you marry and the ones that you sleep with. Honestly, which one do you think my sister is??” As you can imagine I got in a whole lot of trouble for this one.

My friend Jen is really frustrated, she is caught between two guys. One is the Sportsfish and the other is the Keeper. I didn’t know this terminology until Jen explained it too me, “It is from the comedian Steve Harvey, who wrote the book, Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man. “Hmmm…” I said, “That sounds a lot like my theory of the Nester and the Breeder.” I haven’t read his book but the analogy is excellent so I am going to steal it to explain something I seriously doubt Steve does. [click to continue…]


“I caught you putting my bra on while I was sleeping”

by Mike Masters on September 18, 2011

Poor Pig

Thought I would share with you an interview I had over at

Funny site, very similar to texts from last night but has the potential to be funnier.

1) What’s the best breakup story related to Facebook have you heard?

Oh lord, FB can be a horrible place for breakups and general crappiness. A close friend and his fiancé broke up a few years ago, but after they did, her new boyfriend found out they had posted an adult video on a prominent website. My friend couldn’t remove the vid as the website now owned it. The ex GF’s new BF couldn’t accept this, so he called my friend’s work and got him fired from his job by referencing the video. My friend retaliated by contacting their 500 plus FB friends, saying, “Check out Linda’s latest performance!” Which was linked to the adult video. I don’t think, mom, dad, brother, sister, boss were too excited to see this link, well maybe the boss didn’t mind. [click to continue…]


Morality and hotness

by Mike Masters on September 8, 2011

Just a little graphic from my latest book, thought you might enjoy.


Gold digging at it’s finest

by Mike Masters on July 26, 2011

Gold digging at it's finest

Absolutely stellar!


What am I doing wrong? 
Okay, I’m tired of beating around the bush. I’m a beautiful (spectacularly beautiful) 25 year old girl. I’m articulate and classy. I’m not from New York. I’m looking to get married to a guy who makes at least half a million a year. I know how that sounds, but keep in mind that a million a year is middle class in New York City , so I don’t think I’m overreaching at all.

Are there any guys who make 500K or more on this board? Any wives? Could you send me some tips? I dated a business man who makes average around 100 – 150. But that’s where I seem to hit a roadblock. 150,000 won’t get me to central park west. I know a woman in my yoga class who was married to an investment banker and lives in Tribeca, and she’s not as pretty as I am, nor is she a great genius. So what is she doing right? How do I get to her level?

Here are my questions specifically: 
- Where do you single rich men hang out? Give me specifics- bars, restaurants, gyms 
-What are you looking for in a mate? Be honest guys, you won’t hurt my feelings 
-Is there an age range I should be targeting (I’m 25)? 
- Why are some of the women living lavish lifestyles on the upper east side so plain? I’ve seen really ‘plain jane’ boring types who have nothing to offer married to incredibly wealthy guys. I’ve seen drop dead gorgeous girls in singles bars in the east village. What’s the story there? 
- Jobs I should look out for? Everyone knows – lawyer, investment banker, doctor. How much do those guys really make? And where do they hang out? Where do the hedge fund guys hang out? 
- How you decide marriage vs. just a girlfriend? [click to continue…]


Penises, wieners and sexting

Me and my GirlFriend, Mafia Mai answer a sexting question for Tina Tobin over at I hope you enjoy the part where she pulls a knife on me. Got to love Vietnamese girls, sexy and terrifying.

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Obsessed with a cheater and a liar – And she wasn’t even hot!?

About 10 years ago my Japanese teacher from America came to visit Japan to see her family. She was average cute, married, 6 years older than me, but had an attractive body. She came over to my house one day and we got a bit drunk, to my surprise she asked me if I had […]

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1% of the population is clinically psychotic

Disclaimer: This post has gotten a lot of negative comments, probably fueled by only one person and her FB page. I have no desire to remove it or apologize for the content, however I will warn you that this is not a typical post for me. It is for humor only, and not to make […]

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Mailbag, I am in love with a Sith Lord…

This is a question I answered from the awesome Tina Tobin’s site I think this was a killer question and one that ALL of us have suffered from or are suffering from. Don’t miss one… Posted By: Brian Dating > 3 yrs, 29-35 yrs Where do you begin? 3.5 years of waves, both passionate […]

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You just f*cked my lover! – Should I be jealous?

-Jim I’m 45, involved in a long distance relationship with a 26 year old.  Chicago to New York.  We’ve been physically together twice, and both times there was amazing chemistry.  I don’t normally date that huge of a delta in age, but he was interested in me first and looks great naked, so I figured […]

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My morality is inversely proportional to her hotness – A cheater’s story

When I first moved to Japan my roomie and his girlfriend introduced me to a truly awful Japanese TV show. It was one of many things I would read/watch at this time that introduced me to the more fucked up side of human nature. The name of the show was something like “The Stinger” it […]

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Evil little pussy – A sexual and moral clash

Veiled wisdom I think I was about 14 at the time and I felt naively competent enough to handle the world. That is why I found it so irritating I couldn’t maintain my composure around this awful awful woman. I was stuck with my “evil step-mother,” and there was no escape. My father was out, […]

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Hookers, Sluts, Morality, and I hate myelf

Angel on my Shoulder and a Devil in my Head I am sitting with my friend Matt on low 70’s lounge chairs that belong on the beach rather than outside a grubby local bar. We are both sipping Saigon Greens as we watch the foot traffic of back packers, locals and expats go by. Most […]

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Good Signs! 15 great guys that you should date

This is part of the rough draft from a book I am working on with Kim Hess, Divorce Guru The book is “Getting back on the horse after a break up or divorce, a woman’s guide to getting back in the game” Hope you enjoy! 1. He is open to sharing the bad He doesn’t […]

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Warning signs – 15 bad boys that you should never date

This is part of the rough draft from a book I am working on with Kim Hess, Divorce Guru The book is “Getting back on the horse after a break up or divorce, a woman’s guide to getting back in the game” I am very excited to be working on a project with Kim and […]

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