The tight rope of the inappropriate

“I don’t know how many times I’ve sat around with female friends and discussed men who are MUCH too gentle in bed. Seriously… throw me around. Make me wonder where that bruise came from the next day. Don’t stop until we break your bed, or couch or maybe even a bookcase.

Let’s straddle that fine line between danger and safety… together.” – MissAlpha From Adventures of an Alpha Female In reaction to Jack in Brooklyn’s blog post World Peace Part 3

YES!!! This is one of the uses of sexual tension that is the most arousing and most powerful! However, it is dangerous territory but walking that fine line is one of the sexist domains we will ever experience. My eyes were opened to this with a very arousing but disturbing encounter in college, she was only 19 and I 20. (read more…)

Positive Tension - Can you find it?

We talked all night, it was 6 in the morning when we finally forced ourselves to bed. She was staying with us for a couple of days because her apartment was being refinished. I didn’t even know her, I think my roommate had a thing for her. Oops… good thing he was out of town.

It was one of the most interesting, intellectually exciting conversations I have ever had with a woman, and what a woman. She was a knockout! Her father was a British shipping captain and met her mother in Hong Kong. They produced a voluptuous, athletic dark haired beauty, so striking that I felt my confidence deeply challenged. (read more…)

Karake Box - Don't open the door!

We were on the Highway going from the domestic Tokyo airport to Narita international, through the bus windows massive buildings flitted by in the distance. “Do it,” she said with whiskey in her voice. Her eyes were half lidded with sexuality, almost comically so. I looked over to the 6 or so people in the front of the bus and back at Nao. My erection started to stir, Nao turned towards the window and sank down pulling down her already loose jeans exposing herself from the back. “I want you in me,” she said in thick Japanese English. I shook my head internally, amazed at how I found such a sexual woman in a sea of shy flowers. I opened my pants, pulled her tightly close and sank into her. We both of us hit a painfully silent orgasm in minutes. (read more…)

Creating sexual tension

I have wanted to write about Sexual Tension forever, and after reading Jack’s most recent post on creating excellent sex I decided it was time to dive into this war-pig of a topic.

• Why do you want to fuck the bad boy? the bitch?
• Why would a man be aroused (secretly?) by the thought of his wife cheating?
• Why did your friend sleep with her married boss?
• Why is cheating as exciting as it is repulsive?
• Why is “adventurous” sex so arousing?
• Why is breakup and make up sex so incredible?

All of this coalesces down to the incredibly powerful force of sexual tension. The THC in the brownie of attraction. (read more…)

I have created LOVE, LOVE!!!

Guest post by Stephanie, This is in reaction to my blog last Friday in the chemical nature of love and why men run. Stephanie argued with me on twitter for about an hour until I said, “ENOUGH! I have to get stuff done, if you want to write a rebuttal I will publish it!” Well she wrote one and it is very good. I totally disagree! but it is well thought out. Enjoy (read more…)

The love train, does he want off?

My friend Dating Diva recently emailed me this:

“I’m writing a blog post to see how men and women view “falling in love” versus “being in love” to coincide with the post I put up today. I mentioned that I think women blur that line (I know I do) and that men separate them. I’d love your thoughts and I will publish it in my post and link to your blogs on Tales from an Internet Dater.“

I tried to give her a paragraph but I ended up with a LONG mail which I thought I should publish. Just to warn you I bit my tongue on the jokes and answered this as serious as herpes. (read more…)

Is this mister right?

This is part of the rough draft from a book I am working on with Kim Hess, Divorce Guru

The book is “Getting back on the horse after a break up or divorce, a woman’s guide to getting back in the game” Hope you enjoy!

1. He is open to sharing the bad

He doesn’t appear to keep any secrets, he is willing to tell you things that might make a lesser man uncomfortable. A man like this has learned that complete self acceptance means your “flaws” define you, which is not necessarily a bad thing. The limit to this, is if he starts telling sex stories about when he was in Thailand for a month. (read more…)

The bad boy

This is part of the rough draft from a book I am working on with Kim Hess, Divorce Guru

The book is “Getting back on the horse after a break up or divorce, a woman’s guide to getting back in the game” I am very excited to be working on a project with Kim and I can’t wait to see the book released! Our goal for the book is to help people get back into the dating scene, to know what to look for, what to stay away from, and how meet someone fantastic.

Danger signs: Avoiding the bad boys!

1. Never been married and considers a long relationship 1 year
Well this discredits me immediately! This reminds me of what my friend Jack from F*cking in Brooklyn said, “Him being married before means that he has a stamp on his commitment card.” Excellent point, and one that really matters. (read more…)

You want to do what, where??

I love snowboarding, I mean I really really love it and I have gotten nearly every girl I have ever dated into it. A few years back, while taking a girl on a trip to lake Tahoe, I heard the the best line EVER…

I used to go to UC Davis and was a very proud member of the infamous ski and snowboard club. Which nearly got thrown off of campus, when they thought it was a good idea to hold a competition called, complete-couple-clothing swap. That would have been fine except they did it right in front of the cafeteria, on the lawn of the quad, and while the dean was eating. Oops… Clearly my kinda club. (read more…)

Repet after me, "I LOVE GAMES"

What is the dig?

The dig is very simple, it is a challenge, a crossing of wits, a signal that the game is on. A place where the mind is the focus of attraction rather than the body.

What the dig is not

The dig is not abuse or cruelty, although it flirts with it. It is not about winning or crushing your opponent. It simply is the start of a simple tennis match of wit.

Why use the dig?

The dig is the fastest filter I know. What I mean by this is that I can find out in a under a minute if this girl is worth pursuing. While at that same time I can generate attraction by creating tension and challenge. (read more…)